


Irken Helpline

by dibvader



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Parents, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Drug Abuse, Emotional Talks, Fighting, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:42:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26425843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dibvader/pseuds/dibvader
Summary: Just when Zim and Dib started to get along, the Almighty Tallest decide that Zim can finally have an official job as an Irken Helpline Agent.
Relationships: Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 8





	1. The Way to Extraterrestrials

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so this is my first serious fanfic so I’m no professional. I hope you guys like it. ^.^

Dib taps his finger urgently on his desk. He stares over at Zim’s empty desk, anxious by his sudden disappearance. “It’s been four days now…” Dib mumbles. “He said he’d be back by now.” he continues. Ms. Bitters’ chalk snaps in between her fingers, sending a small puff of chalk dust out around her. “Quit your yapping, Dib!” the wicked old woman demands. “Sorry, Ms. Bitters..” Dib grumbles. Ms. Bitters hisses and turns back towards the chalkboard, grabbing a new piece of chalk. Dib continues to worry about Zim.

After Skool, Dib rushes over to Zim’s house, determined to find out what happened to his friend. He runs up to the door and kicks it with intensity, in hopes that it’ll swing open, revealing his epic presence. But instead of an awesome arrival, he gets a loud noise and an injured foot. Dib sadly opens the door. GIR runs over to Dib while squealing loudly. “Dib’s back! Dib’s back!” the robot sings while swinging Dib around in the air. Dib chuckles. “Yeah.. I am.” he smiles. GIR drops Dib. “Whyyyyyy you heeeere?” GIR asks with a smile. He asks this several more times before Dib finally gets a chance to speak. “I’m looking for Zim. He hasn’t been at school and-” Dib is cut-off by a crying GIR falling to his knees and clinging onto his leg. “NOOOOOOOO!!!!! NOT MY MASTERRRRR!!!!!” he cries. “Uhhhh…….” Dib worries. “You good?” Dib asks as he kicks his foot slightly. GIR stands up, no longer saddened in the slightest. “The beanie bean-men took him away!” GIR smiles. “The what?” Dib asks as he watches GIR jump back onto the couch and change the channel to Floopsy Bloops Shmoopsy. Dib looks to Minimoose for help. “Where’s Zim?” he asks. “Nyah!” Minimoose says. “He got a suspicious call from the Tallest?” Dib asks. “Nyah!!” Minimoose explains. “And after that he left without a trace?” Dib questions. “Nyah!!!” Minimoose finishes. “And he didn’t even say goodbye? That’s awful!” Dib exclaims. “But you're right. That is suspicious of him..” Dib agrees as he puts his hands on his hips. “I’m gonna try to call him again.” Dib decides. 

He kneels on the cold floor and opens his Swollen Eyeball briefcase. He pushes some papers out of his way and pulls out a small pad with a red, circular button in the middle. He presses down on the button, and a holographic screen comes up. It appears to be some kind of intergalactic message board. He plugs a mouse into the side of the base and clicks on a name that says “Spaceboy”. Direct Messages to Zim pops up.

“Where u @ spaceboy? XP”

“Sorry for the inconvenience. This  
account is no longer active and/or  
has been terminated. Once again,  
sorry for the inconvenience.”

“Terminated…” Dib mumbled to himself. It didn’t make any sense to him. Dib shakes his head in disbelief. “He wouldn’t just leave…” he mumbles quietly. He stands up and looks at GIR and Minimoose. “We gotta go find Zim.” Dib declares. “Yay!!!” GIR yells in response. “Nyah!!” Minimoose squeaks. Dib grabs GIR’s hand and starts for the door. “He probably went back to Irk, right?” Dib asks GIR. “Mhm!! Prob’ly!!!! I dunno!!!!” GIR smiles. Dib nods. “I guess I know where we’re going.” Dib says. Dib raises his fist in the air towards him as he marches home. “To Irk!!” he yells. “To Irk!!!!!!” GIR repeats while flapping his free arm wildly. Dib arrives back home and kicks his front door open. “Gaz! Tell Dad I might be missing Dinner today!” he yells as he goes right back outside. Gaz puts down her game. “Wait, why?” she asks. “I gotta go to Irk to find Zim. He’s gone!” Dib summarizes as he opens the garage door. Gaz watches him for a moment. She crosses her arms and goes back inside. “Whatever!” she calls to her brother. Dib powers on Tak’s ship and climbs inside. “What are you doing now?!” Tak’s ship complains. “Zim’s missing, and i’m gonna go find him.” Dib answers. Tak’s ship groans. “Fine, whatever…”

And they were off. Two alien servants, a paranormal investigator trainee, and spaceship, moving at light-speed, on a quest to retrieve their friend. GIR talked about tv and food, Minimoose told dark stories of his past and Dib talked about ghosts and family and other regular and not cryptic preteen boy things. They watch as Irk slowly comes into view.


	2. The Silver Crimes of the Irken Empire

“We’re almost there.” states Tak’s ship. “You’ll need a disguise.” she reminds. “Hmmm…” Dib thinks. He grabs his hair and splits it down the middle, making his ‘scythe’ into two. Then he fogged up his glasses so you can’t see his eyes. “How’s this?” he asks. GIR gives a thumbs down, Tak’s ship groans and Minimoose gives a disapproving ‘Nyeh’. “Here, try this.” Tak’s ship says as a glitchy hologram covers Dib’s body. He now has green skin and blue eyes, with a blue uniform to match. His entenae resemble his hair, flowing together behind his head in the shape of a scythe. Dib hops out of the ship. “Thanks, Tak-ship.” he smiles. “Whatever.” grumbles Tak’s ship in a flustered huff. “Send me a transmission when you’re ready to go home. I’ll be around..” Tak’s ship says. Dib nods as she lifts off of the ground. Dib turns back to Minimoose and GIR. “Okay, you two need to promise me that you will not tell anyone why we’re here.” Dib explains. “We promise..” GIR nods slowly. Minimoose squeaks. Dib leans close to Minimoose. “Keep him in line, Minimoose.” Dib whispers. “Nyeh!” Minimoose whispers back. 

The three of them pace around Irk for a good minutes before Dib gives into the fact that he has no idea where he’s going. But before he could figure out what to do about his predicament, he gets surrounded by four tall, fully armored Irken guards. “Who are you and what is your business here?” asks one of the guards. “I-I am Dib!” Dib blurts out. His face turns pale and his mind begins to swirl. He didn’t mean to say his real name. Chances are he’s the only Dib on Irk! He’s gonna get caught for sure, but he tries to act calm. “What is your job?” asks a second guard. But before Dib could answer, a metal arm grabs onto his fake PAK. A huge, spider-like face that was connected to the arm becomes confused. “There is no data in this PAK.” says the spider-like thing emotionlessly. “Impossible!” calls the third guard. “Take him to the Tallest!!!” calls the fourth guard. “W-wait!! Don’t take me to the-” Dib yells before getting cut-off by the guards picking him up and covering his mouth. Dib squirms around but it’s no use; he just can’t get out. GIR and Minimoose follow behind.

Dib is carried to a nearby wall with a huge screen mounted on it. It’s idol screen shows the insignia of the Irken Empire. A keypad next to the screen scans one of the guards eyes and the screen flashes to some kind of loading screen with an Irken phrase on it. Then the Tallest answer. They stare at the guards and Dib with annoyance. Dib begins to feel numb with fear. His heart pounds in his chest like a drum, playing the song of doom. His mind escapes the situation. It’s all a blur. The looks on their faces, the words they’re saying; it’s all just noise to the boy. “I’m going to die here.” loop in his head. Should he try to escape? Or should he just look up. His gaze leads him to the Tallest’s faces. Tallest Purple gets a look of disgust. “He does look bad..” he says. Tallest Red nods in agreement. Tallest Red’s eyes dart to Dib. Fear strikes through the boy's heart. He looks back to the guards. “Just send him to the helpline center.” he shrugs. “We assigned all of those useless people to that job for a reason after all.” Tallest Purple adds. “Yes, my Tallest.” all of the soldiers say in unison. 

The screen turns off and they lead Dib, GIR and Minimoose to a dark, glassy building. Dib is forced inside by the guards, where he is greeted to an eerie, dark room. The only lights at all are the dim turquoise ones illuminating from behind a singular glass booth. The building was called a “Helpline Center”, but it resembles a prison visitation more than anything. Dib walks over to the only available booth and takes a seat in the cold, metallic chair. It sends chills up his body. A screen lowers down in front of Dib. It is entirely in Irken. There's a title, and four options with checkboxes next to them. GIR taps Dib’s shoulder. “I can read it.” he whispers. Dib nods. GIR looks at it for a minute, then starts reading slowly, as if he was a child, only learning to read. “Why….are… you in…?” he begins. “Cr..imes…., disruption……, PAK….mal..func…..tions…., or Tallest direction…?” GIR stutters. Dib checks off “PAK malfunctions”. The screen goes back up into the ceiling. A door shuts behind the three and a short Irken male steps forward behind the glass. His eyes are faded, and lost. His body is unmoving. He looks hypnotized. The Irken opens his mouth and stares deep into Dib’s eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Personally, I am not happy with this chapter. The only good part is the Tallest.


	3. “Hello. Welcome to the Irken Helpline.”

His voice is naturally loud and a little bit raspy. Dib feels his heart skip a beat when he hears the little Irken’s voice. It was a voice so unforgettable. He hears it rattling in his brain day-in-day-out. “Zim…” he mumbles. ‘Zim’ continues. “I understand that you were brought here because of…” ‘Zim’ stops, almost as if he’s buffering. In that moment of silence, Dib recollects his thoughts. “So Zim was recruited as a ‘new employee’ for this… ‘Helpline’. But it seems like they’ve stripped him from his entire personality! He’s just a vessel, being used to hold these scripted robotic lines… Could it be painful-” Dib’s train of thought is cut off by a shock from all around him. ‘Zim’ continues to stare, not feeling any remorse for the pained Dib, or at least not showing it. “Let’s try that again.” ‘Zim’ insists. “I understand that you were brought here because of PAK malfunctions, correct?” he asks in his unfamiliar, cold tone. “Yes..” Dib answers hesitantly. ‘Zim’ nods. “What seemed to be the problem with it?” ‘Zim’ asks robotically. Dib goes quiet. He honestly didn’t really know what was wrong with his ‘PAK’. What made them believe that it was malfunctioning. ‘Zim’ stares blankly as he reaches for a lever behind the booth. “What seemed to be the problem with it?” He asks again. Dib ponders on what to say. ‘Zim’ pulls the lever and Dib gets shocked again. His disguise glitches. ‘Zim’s’ eyes widen slightly. Dib didn’t notice that his human form was visible for a moment. The space around them was deathly silent. GIR looks up at ‘Zim’ sadly. Nobody but Minimoose noticed, but it still hurt all the same. ‘Zim’ seems to brush past what just happened. “I am going to need your Irken Serial Number. I can get you a replacement PAK with it.” ‘Zim’ says. Dib tenses up. He isn’t really an Irken, so he doesn’t have an “Irken Serial Number”. ‘Zim’ moves his hand over to the lever again, but just in time to save Dib, GIR finally breaks. “You’re not my Master!!” GIR yells. “What?” ‘Zim’ asks as he looks at GIR. He almost sounds disturbed. “My Master don’t wanna hurt Dib no-more!! He loves him! He loves ME!!!” GIR continues, his eyes beginning to water. ‘Zim’ frantically pulls on the lever again, but GIR punches through the glass just in time, disabling the electric shock system. Alarms start blaring and red lights start flashing. ‘Zim’ falls backwards onto the floor. His face looks scared and disturbed. GIR jumps over the counter and stands over ‘Zim’, his eyes a glowing red. “Where’s my Master?” GIR asks eerily. ‘Zim’s’ body trembles. His face is pale and his eyes spin like drills. That look is so wrong on someone like Zim. It makes Dib’s stomach twist into knots, but he needs to focus on stopping GIR. Dib runs up behind GIR and grabs his arms, forcing him away from ‘Zim’. Minimoose floats in front of GIR to make sure he doesn’t go back over to ‘Zim’. Dib walks over to ‘Zim’, cautiously. ‘Zim’ moves back slowly. The other Irkens take no note of the commotion. They are just as lifeless as ‘Zim’ was nearly seconds ago. Dib breathes heavily as he approaches ‘Zim’. “Zim… we need to get out of here…” Dib says calmly. ‘Zim’ continues to back away until he hits a wall. “This… job…. It isn’t you!” Dib says. ‘Zim’s’ eyes look glossy. He begins to tear up as he looks down at his hands. He continues to shake as Dib gets closer and closer. “What…. What is this…?” ‘Zim’ stutters while staring at his cold, trembling hands. Before Dib can respond, guards flood the room from all available entrances. They march in, wielding swords made of wires and energy. They shock Dib, GIR and Minimoose. GIR and Minimoose fall cold. Dib’s disguise deactivates and his vision begins to blur. He watches as it all fades to black and the blaring alarms turn to silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NGHHH ANGSTY GIR MAKES SAD I AM SORRY TT^TT


	4. Ideas Swirling

Dib’s vision returns slowly. The tinted blue room he was once in is gone. Now it’s just him and absolute darkness. He tries to walk around, but he falls to his knees. His legs are shaky and worn-out, and his arms are bruised from all of the grabbing and dragging. His head is cloudy and droozy. He claws for the ground in front of him. “Need...to move….forward. Gotta….save...Zim….” mumbles as he crawls across the floor. “Need to...move forward…..” “Gotta save…..Zim…” he repeats. His voice is scratchy and breathless. All of his energy is being put into the thought of Zim. Before long, Dib collapses again. His breaths are big and shaky. Whispers echo around him. “What do you think it is….?” whispers the first voice. “I’m not sure...but it looks so helpless…” whispers another. Dib looks around, drowsy yet fearful. “Awe he looks so scared….” says the first voice. “I almost feel bad…” says the other, pitifully. “If he stops moving, maybe i’ll feel less bad..?” the first one thinks aloud. “Good idea. Someone give him another dousing!” orders the second voice. Another one of those robotic arms from earlier comes out of the darkness, it’s hand appearing as a needle. Dib covers his face with his arms. He feels as tears flow out of his eyes. They’re just tears, but they feel like acid. Right before the needle stucks his skin, Dib cries out in fear. “Please don’t hurt me!” he pleads. The arm stops. The voices begin to chuckle. “Wow. It really is pitiful!” laughs the first voice. “Yeah I know!” laughs the other. “Okay, get the dosage in him already.” The first sighs with a smile. Dib grabs onto the arm. He climbs on top of it, trying to escape to wherever it leads. The arm continues to aim for Dib, accidentally stabbing itself. All of the lights come on as the arm falls limp. A large window is high up on the wall. It seems that the spectators have fled. Dib stumbles his way out of the nearly empty room. Outside of the room is a long, empty hallway. Dib looks left, then right, then left again. He takes a deep breath and runs out of the room. He looks down at his wrist and moves his sleeve, revealing a bracelet of some kind. He taps the middle and the bracelet turns red. “Dib..? What happened?” asks the voice of Tak’s ship from the bracelet. “I got knocked out.” Dib explains. “I need you to come locate me.” Dib says with a trace of panic in his voice. “I’ll see what I can do. For now, you need to get outside.” Tak’s ship responds. “Okay, I’ll try.” Dib says as the bracelet turns a light blue again. He stops at the end of the hall. There's a balcony at the end. Dib runs out of it, and locks the door behind him. He stares off of the balcony at the most breathtaking of sights. 

A stary, pink sky that stretches on for what seems like eons, the bottom lined with the tallest of periwinkle and purple buildings. Different places for work, and entertainment. Along the ground walks way over millions of Irkens. Living. They’re just enjoying their lives and it’s beautiful. Dib has never seen something more real. It just works. And just for a moment, he wondered if Irk could really be that bad. He gives a long, cold sigh. It’s all so organized, and so pretty too. “Of course Zim is from here.” Dib says aloud. “He’s just as pristine… just as pretty…..” Dib leans on the edge, his face turning a light pink. He looks up at the sky with a frown. “Maybe after this… we should…” Dib begins before getting cut off by Tak’s ship hovering down in front of him. “I’m here. Get in.” Tak’s ship demands. Dib hops off the balcony into Tak’s ship. “GIR and Minimoose are gone. We need to go find them.” Dib recaps. “Searching…” Tak’s ship mumbles. “Located. Let’s go!” She calls as she flies high into the taunting, magenta sky of Irk. Dib squeezes his left arm and frowns. He looks back out of the ship, as ideas swirl around in his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna say what they are, but none of Dib's ideas are good.

**Author's Note:**

> This will get more heavy around chapter 4 forwards.


End file.
